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 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*

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PostSubject: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Tue Feb 14, 2012 2:01 am

I have finished the first WEAK draft of the movie storyline. (Weak as in, I wrote it in a short time without thinking too much, not using
many linguistic features and also not including the settings used in the movie; this will be decided when we film as the setting isn't all that important right now especially since
there are going to be changes in setting as characters move around. Not to mention there were changes in past and present tenses which isn't usually a good idea when story telling but it's just a draft lolz. And not all the dialogue is there, I think it would be better if there were some dialogue in the beginning and middle, not just the end. Many other mistakes too.)

This is the first draft, just under 1.5k words. Read if you MUST. And if you do, please tell me what you think, what went well, what needs to be improved, suggestions to make it better, adding or taking things away etc. Restructuring, character roles, whatever, etc.
*HUGE SPOILER*
Spoiler:
 

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Thu Feb 16, 2012 4:55 am

Should I delete this thread?
It seems everyone's afraid to open the spoiler O.o
3DGrin

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Thu Feb 16, 2012 9:40 am

Naaahhh XD I read it..nice draft.

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Thu Feb 16, 2012 10:15 am

PistolNitro wrote:
Naaahhh XD I read it..nice draft.
Thanks. ThumbUp
Any ideas on how to improve it?

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Thu Feb 16, 2012 9:15 pm

SLIM Y U NO LET MY ATTCKS HIT!

Im not sure what need's to be changed probably nothing ThumbsUp
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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Thu Feb 16, 2012 11:43 pm

HomChoi wrote:
SLIM Y U NO LET MY ATTCKS HIT!

Im not sure what need's to be changed probably nothing ThumbsUp
Just waiting for Taluring, ArmorSpark and Bella's view on this and if there
are no major problems, we can just use this instead of me slaving away making an English exam
standard copy. -.-
Banging

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Fri Feb 17, 2012 5:20 am

XLR8 147 wrote:
HomChoi wrote:
SLIM Y U NO LET MY ATTCKS HIT!

Im not sure what need's to be changed probably nothing ThumbsUp
Just waiting for Taluring, ArmorSpark and Bella's view on this and if there
are no major problems, we can just use this instead of me slaving away making an English exam
standard copy. -.-
Banging

Took a while to read dude, not much is wrong with it really.
Just include a bit more detail, maybe describe the team members better.
No one will care about the old legends so keep their description brief, people will want to know
about the new legends.

OH OH IM GOING TO BE A LEGEND RIIIIIIIGHT?
so which one am I? The rude one? The NOOOOOOB? The pushed around dude?
or can I be myself? Cool2 Or maybe the one thats GREEDY?

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Fri Feb 17, 2012 9:01 am

Read it.

It's....do'able.

Just a little worried it gets rather dark in places but I think viewers wont mind too much. I wonder all the time what CN, Gringon, and the Turner Corporation would think of our video IF it were to be finished, IF it were to become popular, and how it will reflect on Xtreme and its associates.

I know how sporadically Internat celebrities show up. One day, You post a video of your dog scooting across the carpet on his butt.......the next day, its the most widely searched viral video. Its really odd how they come about. Its just purely random but I always keep that in mind.


BUT!!! Maybe I'm thinking too much!!!

Anyways, Yeah. Its okay. It's just.........a little dark. But feel free to run with it! You've got my support either way.




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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Fri Feb 17, 2012 1:44 pm

We kinda are the flashiest players kinda sometimes.. this should be a good production.

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Sun Feb 19, 2012 6:26 am

PistolNitro wrote:
We kinda are the flashiest players kinda sometimes.. this should be a good production.
Lol you might be on to something.

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Mon Feb 20, 2012 9:23 am

I like how I'm really upset you killed Hom, then you cheer me up, but then I randomly get sad again. Laughing

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Mon Feb 20, 2012 6:51 pm

You you you you.... Killed me! Misery
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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Tue Feb 21, 2012 4:03 am

Well then! Ill come back as a super awesome evil uhhh ANGEL! Yeah cos of ma white hair and wings >.> And maybe ill.... Ill uhhhhhh Kill you all for killing me! Yeh yeh! That's what ill do! See hwo you like it *Enters corner and mumbles revenge to self* Misery
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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Tue Feb 21, 2012 8:09 am

Lol! Do I see a sequel...?

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Tue Feb 21, 2012 3:04 pm

A sequel? Pfft. Its challenging enough to finish this.....


But a Sequel without Hom? Meh....doesn't smell awesome enough..........according to what he'd think. lol!

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Wed Feb 22, 2012 2:38 am

Gee well ya know I hate to brag but me Hom Choi *cough* supreme-ruler of awesomeness *cough* I guess you shouldn't have really killed me.. but where about's in the draft is this all quoted?

I have re-read it like billions of times finding out possible outcomes of revenge...
Nothing with a volcano.. I want something cooler... Soon you will all fear... me!

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Wed Feb 22, 2012 3:41 am

Taluring wrote:
A sequel? Pfft. Its challenging enough to finish this.....
Thanks for the support Taluring...really... Impressed Ed Face
It's not difficult to finish this thing, its delay is purely due to lack of time available,
I have studying to do, the actor problem is nowhere near as significant as a dilema, it can easily be sorted out;
we would just need camera trickery (maybe not) or we need to replace actors or
(most likely...) we need to cause the lost actors to be missing somehow (death? Capture? Injury?) while still suiting the story well and then
adding legends or followers to the journey they face trying to locate Slim and stop him and his trail of evil.

This will be a decent movie, in comparison to other films, we have a good shot. Evilz
BAh, don't take it so seriously, it's a YouTube film, we just want to create something for people to
watch and then maybe one day we can remake these FF movies into animated versions and really
start a franchise.....oh wait...about taking this seriously....lol. Sure Lol

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Wed Feb 22, 2012 6:01 am

Quote :
Thanks for the support Taluring...really...

OH! No problem!!! Always here to help!

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Wed Feb 22, 2012 6:09 am

Sop if there is a sequel >_> and apparently I die in the first... Does that mean... No! Assassin? Awesome Guy? LE HOM CHOI! the white haired wonder? ._. The green'n'white angelic hero?


I AM THE ALL MIGHTY FORCE OF EVIL! AND AWESOMENESS!


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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Wed Feb 22, 2012 6:37 am

Oh.....you.....



You are just TRYING to fish for Bella's eye arent cha? Rolling Eyes

You guys always constantly remind me of why I continue to come here.....

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Wed Feb 22, 2012 6:51 am

It IS still in its draft stages. Maybe your extremeness can be written back in.....somehow.

I only gave the draft a glance over. I'll take a gander at it again....

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Wed Feb 22, 2012 7:01 am

Taluring wrote:
Oh.....you.....



You are just TRYING to fish for Bella's eye arent cha? Rolling Eyes

You guys always constantly remind me of why I continue to come here.....
What know? Ohhhhhh sorry you mean that girl who posted on the Valentines thread?
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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Wed Feb 22, 2012 7:02 am

Sorry I hardly know people on dis forum >.< Probs you, X ,Pistol maybe Slim (if he ever came on) Sky, Few others .___.
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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Wed Feb 22, 2012 7:06 am

AGHHHHH I Can't find the part where I die v.v did you guy's lie to me! ME! HOM CHOI! THIS BE TRECHORY I SNIFF! I HOPE YOUR ALL HAPPY AND BROKEN A POOR GUYS HEART! Misery
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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Wed Feb 22, 2012 7:07 am

*Le head entering wall* I need a seat... (Notice my meme refrence<<< sorry im a meme addict...)
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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Wed Feb 22, 2012 7:14 am

Oh No! The Hom's upset!
What shall we do!

I actually didnt see the part where you died. X's wall of text......iz a wall. I think I might have missed it....

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Wed Feb 22, 2012 7:17 am

Ok setting my jokes aside I really am puzzled. I don't see nothing about me dying I have read this to the end and I don't see nothing -___- Confuzzled! (Confused and puzzled were traded over *cue pokemon song* WELL DONE YOU OBTAINED PUZZLED!)

What? Puzzled is evolving! *Pokemon evolution music* Your Puzzled involed into CONFUZZLED!

Yep... Just thought of that >.<
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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Wed Feb 22, 2012 7:19 am

OH MAI GAWD THIS IS MY 100TH POST *CONFETTI EVERYWHERE* DIS IS SO AMAZAN! I WANT TO THANK ALL MY FANS FOR SUPPORTING ME THROUGH MY 100 POSTS! IT'S ALL BEEN WORTH WHILE! THANK YOU THANK YOU1


Yep... just made that for the sake of it .___. Ima go back to search for my Death scene
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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Wed Feb 22, 2012 7:22 am

Day: 672

Water is low... I don't think I ate since day... day 8 I think this is the end for me.. I find the Death Scene soon I already ate my blindfold... due to the fact my eyes were last shown about 3 years ago they have been censored... I ate my wings... even my hair v.v I hope help comes soon
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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Wed Feb 22, 2012 7:39 am

3DGrin
congratulations on your 100th post!


But I have 500.

Your joy is now invalid.

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Wed Feb 22, 2012 9:02 am

HomChoi wrote:
OH MAI GAWD THIS IS MY 100TH POST *CONFETTI EVERYWHERE* DIS IS SO AMAZAN! I WANT TO THANK ALL MY FANS FOR SUPPORTING ME THROUGH MY 100 POSTS! IT'S ALL BEEN WORTH WHILE! THANK YOU THANK YOU1


Yep... just made that for the sake of it .___. Ima go back to search for my Death scene
Congratz... also, let me clear this up for you, since you ate your blindfold...
Hom Choi without a blindfold ----> Ed Face Lol.

Any way, you don't actually die in the movie, (unless you want to and suggest a reason why????)
Oliver De Zombieweasel read the script wrong, it was Slim that dies. Oops spoiler. 3DGrin

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Wed Feb 22, 2012 9:07 am

XLR8 147 wrote:

Hom Choi without a blindfold ----> Ed Face Lol.

Oh! so THAT'S why The Hom wears a BlindFold???


THAT. EXPLAINS. EVERYTHING!!!!

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Wed Feb 22, 2012 9:19 am

Taluring wrote:
XLR8 147 wrote:

Hom Choi without a blindfold ----> Ed Face Lol.

Oh! so THAT'S why The Hom wears a BlindFold???


THAT. EXPLAINS. EVERYTHING!!!!
Couldn't have put it better myself. ThumbsUp

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Wed Feb 22, 2012 7:16 pm

Actually my eyes are hawt! and that's all im sayin bout em! I have seen someone's eyes ehehe and I wont mention who it was but ;et's just say... when you leave the game... make sure your eyes dont show >Very Happy
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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Thu Feb 23, 2012 6:11 am

Also if I so happened to die in the film (I dunno if that would be cool) I should atleast have an Epic Death Scene! Like I die a hero Awesome Or maybe it's something which everyone would cry to... Misery Or just plain awesome! MadBoss
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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Thu Feb 23, 2012 6:20 am

Ok, when I said about a sequel, I was kinda being sarcastic. I know, hard to tell if it's in writing. And at least we now know that Hom doesn't die. Although I swear it DID say he dies! And here is my reaction to that:

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Thu Feb 23, 2012 6:46 am

Well that depends on what you all think about it... Let's just say...

Should Hom die?
Or should Hom live?

YOU DECIDE!
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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Thu Feb 23, 2012 6:48 am

I don't mind what you guys want ^^ either way ill get a few laughs outta it.
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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Thu Feb 23, 2012 6:53 am

HomChoi wrote:
I have seen someone's eyes ehehe and I wont mention who it was but ;et's just say... when you leave the game... make sure your eyes dont show >Very Happy
You're referring to me? Dude you and Taluring did not see my eyes, I kept my blindfold on even after I froze,
where has this story come from? IZ LIEZ I TELLZ U! Big Grin No seriously....the blindfold was stuck on...

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Thu Feb 23, 2012 7:48 am

HomChoi wrote:
Well that depends on what you all think about it... Let's just say...

Should Hom die?
Or should Hom live?

YOU DECIDE!

I think you should live. Smile

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Last edited by DeZombieweasel on Thu Feb 23, 2012 7:51 am; edited 1 time in total
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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Thu Feb 23, 2012 7:50 am

XLR8 147 wrote:
HomChoi wrote:
I have seen someone's eyes ehehe and I wont mention who it was but ;et's just say... when you leave the game... make sure your eyes dont show >Very Happy
You're referring to me? Dude you and Taluring did not see my eyes, I kept my blindfold on even after I froze,
where has this story come from? IZ LIEZ I TELLZ U! Big Grin No seriously....the blindfold was stuck on...
NAW NAW NAW When I met you on Zero at the Bad Max area and when you left it showed your eyes!

Ima be honest it usually does that when you sign off and your char fades your eyes always show! it happens to me to... It totally kills the mystery behind it! I like my eyes to be hidden... it's cause only special people get to look! and noone hasn't seen them for ages v.v
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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Thu Feb 23, 2012 7:54 am

Ever since I got my Dexter Glasses, I only showed by eyes to only one person. It's like almost everyone working on this movie has mysterious eyes...

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Thu Feb 23, 2012 8:21 am

Well yeah it ruins the mystery DESPITE the fact it's not a big deal because come on, there are only a few possible combinations
and they all look very similar any way so it's nothing special; but it does take away mystery
so I decided keep my blindfold on, make a sort of personality component out of it...
although, since then, many MANY people have adopted the style of the blindfold.
And any way, blindfolds are cool. Yep

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Thu Feb 23, 2012 11:01 am

XLR8 147 wrote:
Well yeah it ruins the mystery DESPITE the fact it's not a big deal because come on, there are only a few possible combinations
and they all look very similar any way so it's nothing special; but it does take away mystery
so I decided keep my blindfold on, make a sort of personality component out of it...
although, since then, many MANY people have adopted the style of the blindfold.
And any way, blindfolds are cool. Yep

Yes they are. I don't know if I never got a blindfold on Oliver or sold it. If I did, then I'd do this... ED Head Bang

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Thu Feb 23, 2012 1:18 pm

The Hom.....
MUST LIVE!


Heroes are remembered......

But Legends never Die...


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However I cant gurantee that I will get them finished fast..........or at all.
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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Fri Feb 24, 2012 6:22 am

Taluring wrote:
The Hom.....
MUST LIVE!


Heroes are remembered......

But Legends never Die...


Agreed.

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Fri Feb 24, 2012 6:28 am

I Guess this Legend just doesn't...


( •_•)

( •_•)>⌐■-■

(⌐■_■)


Give a ****!


YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!




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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Sat Feb 25, 2012 11:08 am

Hey guys! I've just thought up an idea for the intro in the movie! Maybe we can do a storybook thing that explains what's going on or something. Yeah, I got the idea from Spyro 2. What'ya think?

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Sat Feb 25, 2012 11:09 am

DeZombieweasel wrote:
Hey guys! I've just thought up an idea for the intro in the movie! Maybe we can do a storybook thing that explains what's going on or something. Yeah, I got the idea from Spyro 2. What'ya think?
I don't know about a book but narration is a great idea!
ThumbUp

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PostSubject: Re: 7 Legends story draft *SPOILER ALERT*   Sat Feb 25, 2012 11:14 am

By book, I meant one sentence per page with a picture at the top, for those who didn't know what I meant. And that'll be a LOT of people.

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